Bob, the musical plush tiger · Thu Feb 4, 11:24 pm by Bron
wow. that’s all I can say.
I was a little blown away by Lui’s funeral. There would have been close to 200 people at the mass. He was larger than life. And as Anna-maria said, he knew everyone. The eulogy she gave was so well written, and incredibly well delivered. I could never be as steadfast as she was standing up there, if anything happened to either of my brothers. I would simply be physically, mentally and emotionally- incapable.
It is an especially hard time for their family because Lui’s grandmother died the day before he did. He had also been getting better, and had moved out of the ICU.
I find it so hard only learning things about people once they’re gone. All the things you never knew, all the questions you never thought to ask. I am always filled with an aching, to be a better person.
At the burial, they play more of his music. Lui on drums, Aaron on sax. We throw dirt on the coffin, and everyone waits to offer their condolences to his parents and his sister.
As we are leaving, we pass by his grave again. Aaron stops and just stands there in the heat of the day. And this image breaks my heart. He has just had a daughter, and he has to say goodbye to one of his best friends.
happily ever laughter · Tue Jan 26, 11:09 pm by Bron
Well I’ve been swing dancing for about 4 months now. Su had mentioned she was learning and asked if I wanted to come along, so of course I was thrilled to find someone to go with -I did a course with Devo and Kim a couple of years ago, but we never went to any of the social events, and I basically forgot whatever I picked up.
This time round, we’re going to pretty much everything we can, and are well and truly hook-line-and-sinkered. When we worked out that one class a week wasn’t enough, we stepped it up to two, and then three and started school-hopping.
The scene is a mix of straight-laced conservative folk and artsy alternative types with a few quirky space cadets thrown in. But no matter who I dance with, it’s a pretty safe bet I’ll laugh. This is because, a) I generally stuff something up and b) I’m having a good time.
Last week I danced with a guy I hadn’t seen out before, and he was doing a lot of fancy footwork. I found it difficult to follow because I hadn’t learnt a lot of the moves and wasn’t sure what I was meant to do, so I was laughing.
Half-way through the dance, the guy stops, rolls his eyes up and says something like, “If you’re going to laugh I’m going to..” (I couldn’t hear because of the band, but I noticed he wasn’t looking at me, wasn’t smiling and was swearing under his breath). I was taken aback by this so I asked, “wait, what did you say?” Again he didn’t look at me and said, “If you’re going to keep laughing at me I’m not going to dance with you!” I wondered for a second if he might be joking, but he looked like he wanted to punch me in the face. I was actually a bit shocked. wtf. “I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing at myself because I don’t know what to do.. whoa.” He totally killed my mood. He said “well it doesn’t come across like that.”
Anyway after a moment he apologised and we kept dancing but I didn’t even want to smile then. Hey if he’s going to jump down my throat like that then I’m going to look as stone-faced as he does and we’ll do the fucking funeral dance.
I just don’t understand why people take themselves so seriously. I had assumed that with all his fancy footwork he was a better, more experienced dancer. Su said after that he may have told her he’s only been dancing for a couple months. I guess he must have been self-conscious, but dude, lighten the fuck up!
I was pissed off because it made me doubt myself. Made me think that maybe I shouldn’t laugh at all. Have I unintentionally offended anyone else because of it? Does anyone else take it that seriously?
Interpretation is a mixed bag.
Demerit point(s) [1]
Frog fingers · Sun Jan 24, 11:37 am by Bron
Lui passed away on Friday night after a tough battle with cancer. He was 32. He lost his ‘fro, but I don’t think he ever lost the will to live. And that makes this all the more unfair.
His facebook wall is filled with goodbyes from people that knew and loved him. But for some reason I can’t do that, I’m not exactly sure why. I guess it’s just the age we live in.
If I was where I would be
Then I would be where I am not
Here I am where I must be
Where I would, I can not
[Karen Dalton- Katie Cruel
the (electric) toad · Sun Jan 10, 09:18 pm by Bron
So this is what Mercer sees, he thought as he painstakingly tied the cardboard box shut. Tied it again and again. Life which we can no longer distinguish; life carefully buried up to its forehead in the carcass of a dead world. In every cinder of the universe Mercer probably perceives inconspicuous life. Now I know, he thought. And once having seen through Mercer’s eyes I probably will never stop.
[Philip K. Dick]
It’s there, amongst the rubble. Between the cracks. The toad. But life is both the toad and the rubble. Opportunity and ruin. It is the rapture in discovery, and also the disenchantment in flipping the toad over to see the control panel in its belly.
Mildred Ellen Jacobs · Tue Jan 5, 10:20 pm by Bron
There used to be the three of them- I guess it was a strange situation, Larry Senior and his wife Olga, and Olga’s sister Mildred, who never married. We used to call them little nana and big nana as kids. Our cousin called them kitchen nana and lounge nana. And now grandpop is alone in that house. He looked so lost. Fallen. He could hardly talk, I didn’t know what to say. Seeing other people upset- that’s what often upsets me most at funerals.
When I heard I went over to see mum, she was in bed and I climbed in next to her and said I was sorry, and she cried. It is so hard to see your parents cry.
She never forgot anyone’s birthday. She knew everyone’s name. Everyone’s. I wouldn’t have a clue when it comes to extended family.
I am sad, for all that is lost with her. That history. Mum says she’s the reason they came to Australia from India, and now I can’t ask her about it. The stories I may never know about our family. Family- something that should be so familiar, and sacred. And yet I never even knew her middle name.
the Sleeper Agent · Sun Jan 3, 01:51 pm by Bron
It is the Sleeper Agent.
It waits, silenced by sunshine and lollipops.
Caramel-skinned, she puts a finger to sticky lips.
Disguised by time and distance,
(mis)taken for only a memory.
animal kingdom · Sun Dec 13, 10:52 pm by Bron
Robina: “Not in my bed, and not in your bed, but maybe in a room with 30 other people around.”
That girl cracks me up.
Purpose-built · Mon Dec 7, 03:35 pm by Bron
There is a pianola in my hallway, jacked up on planks of wood.
The plan was to move it into the lounge, but it won’t fit through the door so it has to go back to the folks’ place. The removalist never showed up, so dad intends to move it himself: he’s put his purpose-built wheels underneath it, and he is simply going to wheel it down the 9 streets back home.
I can’t wait to get a photo of this.
Demerit point(s) [2]
Lasseter · Sun Dec 6, 07:35 pm by Bron
This time it’s not the wind in the trees, and slowly we see a red cloud of dust coming down the road. When they pull up I wander over, embarrassed. I speak to the South African first; he gets out the passenger side. When I see Paul I feel even stupider. He’s gorgeous. I can see a few scars on the side of his face, but he has this gentle demeanor that is so unexpected out here.
The next day I am shy in the backseat. We pass a lot of camels. I feel the road slide beneath us as we fishtail along the 300km to Yulara. I have butterflies and I’m blushing. It’s completely ridiculous- maybe it’s the heat. Nic does most of the talking. She asks if they live out here with their families. He says it’s just him and his dog. That’s all he needs.
[October 09]
Pink Triathlon · Sat Nov 21, 10:06 am by Bron
Medium course, 25-29: 00:44:42 (av. 00:47:31, fastest 00:38:25) 16th out of 43
| 200m swim | 6km cycle | 2km run |
| 00:05:16 | 00:26:23 | 00:13:02 |
I felt pretty good just having done this, but with no prior training I found the run a big shock to the system. Any time I exercise I get a killer headache. I’m not really sure what to do about that, but I’ve got to keep up some level of regular activity. The sun is out, when the clouds aren’t.. it’s good to get amongst it.