paper dolls · 07/07/2011 09:37 pm by Bron
I haven’t written anything about where I’m at since I started this gig. The reasons are similar to why I haven’t written anything in the gorgeous little green leather book Su and Beans gave me before I left.
This has been so incredibly hard- a cross roads treadmill. Running against the workflow, against these feelings of failure, but getting no where. I have this chronic inability to make a decision which wreaks havoc with my headspce. It’s slightly absurd that I am trying cite references on positive psychology in an intervention assignment. On how I’ve planned, implemented and evaluated an intervention which has helped build resilience. Slightly absurd.
Maybe one of the hardest things is knowing there are people who would (and have) argued otherwise. They tell me I’m doing ok. Tell me to hang in. Tell me that it’s worth it. It gets better. They’ve sat down with me and tried to help me plan and come up with strategies. I’ve been blown away by the generosity, but it just makes the fact that I’m moving backwards even harder to take. A quarter of the way through, I’m not sure if I can make even another term. Despite all the help, it seems I am simply not cut out for this.
